I'm being mentally tortured by my estate agent. I would be no good in an interrogation situation:
Gestapo officer: You do want to live in a too expensive house in a style you don't really like
Me: No, no I don't, ........do I?
Gestapo officer: You DO want this house, the market is going up, you are being silly about your needs.
Me: No, I'm not.... uh....am I?
Gestapo Officer: I already have a lot of people lined up and interested in this house but I'm offering it to you, you would be a fool not to have it.
Me: Oh, I'm flattered, I'll certainly think about it, I'm such a fool dithering aren't I? It's just that the house needs so much work and we won't be able to afford it.
Gestapo Officer: But you have to look at the big picture, you'd never lose with a house like that!
Me: Oh you're right of course, we will certainly look at it again.
Gestapo Officer: (Thinks : "hahahahahahahahhahahahahaha, we SO need to make a sale on this house, we are SO not doing very well, this will make me a tidy profit, it's in the bag.
Me: (Thinks: "I'm not such a mug you stupid effing 'been on too many 'how to sell to women' courses' - they won't wash with me you smooth talking bastard!)
Gestapo officer: You do want to live in a too expensive house in a style you don't really like
Me: No, no I don't, ........do I?
Gestapo officer: You DO want this house, the market is going up, you are being silly about your needs.
Me: No, I'm not.... uh....am I?
Gestapo Officer: I already have a lot of people lined up and interested in this house but I'm offering it to you, you would be a fool not to have it.
Me: Oh, I'm flattered, I'll certainly think about it, I'm such a fool dithering aren't I? It's just that the house needs so much work and we won't be able to afford it.
Gestapo Officer: But you have to look at the big picture, you'd never lose with a house like that!
Me: Oh you're right of course, we will certainly look at it again.
Gestapo Officer: (Thinks : "hahahahahahahahhahahahahaha, we SO need to make a sale on this house, we are SO not doing very well, this will make me a tidy profit, it's in the bag.
Me: (Thinks: "I'm not such a mug you stupid effing 'been on too many 'how to sell to women' courses' - they won't wash with me you smooth talking bastard!)
posted by ramblingwoman at
5:45 PM
9 Comments:
Ha ha ha - that was a VERY tortured dialogue...are you actually getting any sleep these days?
Poor you Luce...big hugs..:-)
xxx
Yes, very funny. At least you can laugh.
I dunno what you should do. They do say you should go for the best house in the best area that you can possibly afford but . . . well you do need to be able to afford gin and food and wine and holidays.
But don't let those bastard estate agents get you down.
Oh that was very Spooks! Good thing you are wise to their fiendish techniques.
Is the " 'effin B" the only agent in town?
I feel you don't want this one. Doesn't have the charm you're after eh?
How about striking out on your own and putting an add in the paper - on the school notice board, in the post office/local shop of the area you want etc. You know the market well enough by now. So well you could set up as an agent in your own right with what you now know!
lol xxx
hahahaha Bangla Jess - I did suggest to the agent I could get a job with him on a Saturday! To which he said "we wouldn't be able to keep you out of the houses" and I said "well, I can't do it I'm too honest" (!!) to which he said "I'm honest, I'm nothing but honest with you" (he said dishonestly)
I do think Kitty has a point though - buy the worst house in the best area - but it's a home not just an investment opportunity. Could we live in that house with all the work it needs doing? All the pipework was along the walls because of the lovely original oak flooring - that would be a pain. (small point but still).
I can't envisage us in that house, so I just have to gird my loins and tell him straight.
It's gone on for so long now I'm finding it hard to envisage myself anywhere.
Awwww Sweetie - do not despair - this period in your life will be but a memory soon .....
And you are so doing the best thing by holding out for the right place for you, rather than what the estate agent thinks you should buy
~(:o})=
Good on you girl, don't let that jive talker patronise you. They must think we're all mugs
Yep! Best to hang back, and drink gin than go for a house you already know isn't the one!
Very Spooks!? hahaha..
RW!!!!
RW!!!!???
Is this true?
Is it really your birthday today??
Have a lovely day and I hope you get everything
you want!
love Txxx
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